Many a smartass summer intern (see “Don’t be a Smartass”) try to impress their loyalty to their chosen firm by putting down the competition. Don’t. You never know whether your analyst who thinks quite highly of you is waiting for his bonus before moving to shitty, Goldmen or Moron Stanley. Don’t ruin your chances of getting a call to move once they jump ship just because you dissed the competition.
Don’t aim too high:
An anonymous banker highlighted that you shouldn’t suck up to your MD or VP. Correct. You should aim lower, and suck up to your analyst, because it’s their job to suck up to the associate, whose job it is to suck up to the VP and so on. Don’t forget the hierarchy.
Don’t forget you’re there to support:
And that means support. Carry an extra tie with you, just in case your analyst get called to a meeting and the chino wearing shit needs one. Make sure you’re the same build as your analyst, so he can also borrow your suit if he needs one (if you’re more buff than said analyst, stop going to the gym – this will give you added points as you will soon lose your athletic build and become less intimidating to your analyst). Always carry shoe polish, in case said analyst’s shoes need a shine. Forget your blackberry holster – what you need is a coffee cup holder for more than four cups – this way, you’ll need only make a single trip to Starbucks each morning when you bring your team coffee.